The Discipline of Setting Boundaries by Suf Alkhaldi

Creating boundaries to protect yourself

We all have some kind of red lines not to cross to protect ourselves and to create boundaries.  Some of us have more boundaries than others.  In general, boundaries prevent us from getting in trouble.  Boundaries form by cumulative life experiences in addition to personal belief, as well as reading books and watching TV.  Some have more boundaries than others.  The first experience of discovering boundaries usually is created and enforced by parents to build organized structural safe environments to their kids, allowing us to work and understand the society around our childhood.  My parents, for example, asked me not to get involved with bad behavior, always respect people, and try to help them.  I still remember my dad telling me that I will never ever trick people more than once, and most likely I will pay the price sooner or later.

My dad created these boundaries of not deceiving people to help me crystallize a concept of working hard.  When I was 12 years old, my dad gave me a book, telling me it is time to get your mind in the growth state.  He did the same to my two brothers.  For some reason, I was the only one who followed his advice– my two brothers did not finish their assigned books.  As I started to read books nonstop, the new habit kept me out of trouble, preventing me from joining the mainstream of my generation.  My new habit of reading books refined my boundaries, allowing me to create big dreams. During that journey, I discovered my passion for science.  My boundaries shaped my thinking and passion allowing me to avoid so many mistakes which my friends usually paid a big price for.  Setting boundaries created my analytical mind, shaped by reading many books and interacting with people.

Warren Buffet mentioned one time that the best way to grow is to learn from other people’s experience.  My childhood boundaries prevented me from getting into trouble. They made me curious about other people’s boundaries. Boundaries allow people to be successful. Warren Buffet developed his boundaries of living simply in his early life.  In one of his video tours of his furniture store in Omaha, Nebraska with Bill Gates, trying a new bed.  Bill liked the bed, telling Warren it is more comfortable than his bed at home.  He said his mattress at home was not that old.  Bill asked Warren, when he bought his mattress. Warren, puzzled by the unexpected question, answered by saying that he could not remember buying a mattress.  Warren continued, in fact he cannot remember that he bought anything.  That was an eye-opening response to Bill Gates.  The simplicity of Warren Buffet’s life was a product of his early life habits which were formed by boundaries, leading him to adopt the best method to be rich.

Several of my boundaries protected me from a lot of trouble and distractions.  I am very happy that these boundaries helped me to navigate life with little pain.

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